#smallvictories

today's weight: 240

Yep, I just posted my weight.  I'm not ashamed.  I am on an incredible journey and want to share everything with you (and selfishly, document it for myself) and if I can, in any way, motivate someone else to do the same, I'll share every last detail.  Another reason I share it is because it's just a number. It says absolutely nothing about me.  It gives you no indication of how much I love my family, or how much joy I take in making people laugh.  It doesn't tell you how dedicated I am to God and how blessed I feel to wake up every day to an incredible, hard working, hard loving husband and the two most beautiful little boys.  My weight says NOTHING about me and it's just a number.  Ladies, young women, listen up: we are beautiful.  We are amazing.  Never be ashamed of the way you are.  Just like Bruno Mars says "Because you're amazing, just the way you are" and how Billy Joel tells me "don't go changing to try and please me, I love you just the way you are."  You are loved, you are amazing, and most importantly, God loves you just the way you are!  Sure, I may joke every now and then about being chubby or whatev, but what I am about to say is so important (especially to young ladies).  I.Love.Myself.  I love myself.  I love myself.  Say it with me.  I love myself.

That being said, I am obese.  My weight goal is to lose 60lbs.  I had a great talk with my doctor this morning about this and she thought it was a perfect goal.  And if, once I get to 180, I want to lose more I know what to do!  It's been almost a year since I've really done any kind of physical activity.  So, imagine an obese woman who is incredibly out of shape starting out.

Today, my third day on the elliptical machine we bought, I went 1.17 miles and was in constant motion with the exception of two times I just had to stop for a few seconds because my thighs were burning.  I kept around the same speed for 30 full minutes.  I know to some this may seem small, but for me, it was huge.  It is huge.  At one point, thanks to Beyonce telling me that I could run the world, I was actually jogging for a good 15 minutes.  Towards the end with about five minutes left my lungs were on fire and I had a pain in my side.  I wanted to just stop.  "There's only five minuets left, Mandi, what's five minutes?"  I didn't stop.  I put my determination hat on and finished.  I don't want to sound all "I just did a mile on a machine and I didn't give up" but I'm going to because I am so proud of myself!  Sure, I felt sweat in places I had no idea sweat would ever be, but it was that good, accomplished feeling.  I know how I can be with physical activity and quitting.  Today, I didn't quit.  I kept pushing and in the end, I will be so much healthier for it!

Also, water.  I just finished 75oz of water.  Did you know that you are supposed to drink half your weight in water each day?  Today is day three of me trying that and it's been so easy today!  It's only 2:30 and I've already drank 75oz of water!

I go to music for a lot.  There is a song that really speaks to me.  It's called Beautiful Things and it's really helped me to realize that no matter what, Christ will take me and make me beautiful. Click here to listen to the song Beautiful Things.

Also, Thanks to Beyonce today for really making me push and push and make it to 0:00.  Who Runs The World?

Now off to shower.  I stink!